I don't really need to write an introduction. Just look at this photo and you'll see how I spent Sunday evening:
That's my six-year old in the chair and my husband holding his hand. Our super nice dentist came out in the RAIN (which was getting ready to turn to sleet) on a Sunday night to fix my kid's broken front tooth. I sent this text while we waited:
My son and husband were playing tag in the living room and my son accidentally went down hard. He spit out two small pieces of his tooth and then wailed (I don't blame him). We got out a flashlight to try to find more pieces of the tooth. In the midst of this crisis we had moments of absurdity, as my son kept bringing me pieces of white popcorn kernels. He'd get so excited: "I found my tooth!". I'd check it and be like, "Nope, it's just popcorn." Just so you know, I was getting ready to vacuum right before this incident occurred. I like to think that we don't normally have so many pieces of popcorn on the living room floor. I could be wrong. The tooth was fixed and we were back home by 9PM.
It snowed here overnight and schools were closed this morning, which meant I had to take a day off from work. I sent this text shortly after we got up:
By lunchtime the snow had tapered off and the roads were in good shape so we decided to go see a movie. Afterwards we went to Trader Joe's and I had to send this text:
The guy that my son touched was a bagger with Down Syndrome (after he had told him "You're a nice man"). I told my son, "You can't just touch strangers". The bagger replied, "I'm not a stranger. I don't have a gun". He repeated this twice to my son. I wanted to say, "Uh, that doesn't really make sense" but I let it go. Before we even got into line, my son, who has apparently been reading Emily Post, told me, "Be sure to use good manners with the cashier". Thanks for that advice small human who still needs a butt check after most BM's. Otherwise I might have forgotten the correct rules of polite society. So this is how I've spent my last twenty-four hours. Tomorrow I'm going to skip into work saying, "Free at last, free at last...". I'm not even joking about that.
I'm the worst kind of asshole-- I think I'm funny.
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(Note--I only joined FB in January 2016. Come be my friend, if you want, and like my page before I get fed up with the whole thing and delete my FB account. Kidding. Maybe.)